


you knew how to swim and you never tried to teach me

by lilvenus



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Break Up, Hurt Choi Soobin, Kang Taehyun is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Sad Ending, Taebin - Freeform, Tomorrow x together - Freeform, better seperated, not meant to be, txt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:54:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28086510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilvenus/pseuds/lilvenus
Summary: “We can’t go on like this”Lie. Lie to me please. One last time, tell me that you love me.“I’m tired” you finally said.Written in Soobin's POV unfolds the downfall of their once picture perfect relationship.
Relationships: Choi Soobin & Kang Taehyun
Comments: 1
Kudos: 6





	you knew how to swim and you never tried to teach me

You said it first. Remember?

The three words that holds so much weight to them. You said it. To _me_.

Do you remember the way I was shaking when you told me how you felt about me? About us? Or about how you told me that I was all you ever needed and more.

Did you forget?

How you were on the verge of breaking, afraid you would lose me. It was you who came to me.

But what have we come to. Look at us now.

We used to say the same things over and over again. I would say that I am the captain and that you were my trusty crewmate, my anchor. The one holding me together. The one I relied on to keep me in place.

We were so arrogant.

What made us so sure that the boat connecting us was secure. Why didn't we notice the holes and the water leaking in?

Was it even stable to begin with? What made us think that we would never fall into the deep end.

The problem with the both of us is our fantasy that we make out of one another. The perfect picture that we sculpted for each other, hoping they would fit the frame we built. We soon came to realise that we were actually in love with the idea of the other and not the person themselves.

That was when things went loose.

If I had to say one thing about us, I would point out how similar we were. Our thoughts flow in the same direction which became the reason why we never fought..

or to be more specific we let the little things pass us by.

We did this constantly without realising that these _little_ things aren’t really little and that we were just pretending to be okay. Small but dangerous. 

Day by day our fights got bigger and bigger but we never talk things out.

Not one is trying to save the other.

Not one wanting to lose.

Not one wanting to give in.

The two of us stranded in silence to the point where it became a new place of comfort. A place we would never get out of. A place we drown in. As the water slowly comes in and fills our lungs. Step by step it starts cutting off the oxygen within. But I was drowning alone. Because you knew how to swim and you never tried to teach me.

You always know what to say to make me feel better but you also have a talent of making me feel bad. You know how much your words hurt and still you do it.

I can’t keep up with the amount of times I’ve caught you lying to me. My head would constantly make out scenarios of me confronting you…

but it never happens because even in my head, your arms would greet me before my lips could move.

So tell me why did you stop? Lie to me one last time. Lie to me and tell me what I want to hear. _Please_.

The air was particularly thick that day. Heavy and hard to breathe. We sat in the living room with the tv on.

Anyone would have noticed the distance between us but it was dark so there’s my excuse.

What happened to all the cuddling and all the midnight snacks we shared here? Was that all a dream…I can’t tell the difference anymore.

How is it possible to feel so suffocated in a loud room? It felt empty. I felt empty. Our once familiar routine, now became a stranger. I couldn’t find the right words but I knew the end for us was near.

“We can’t go on like this”

Lie. Lie to me please. One last time, tell me that you love me.

“I’m tired” you finally said.

_Tired_.

Loving you was hard Taehyun, but I was never tired of you.

Your voice that once comforted me now became my breaking point. How could you say that to me?

Take a look at this house. We built it over time together didn’t we? It was hard but we did it, the two of us…

If you’re saying that you can easily forget about this house that we shared, I guess the foundation wasn’t strong enough to begin with.

I want to fix this but deep down I know I can’t do it alone. not without you by my side. You once told me that anger is just sadness that had nowhere to go to. That was how I felt. I was angry. I wanted to cry but I held back and instead told you I _hated_ you.

I wanted you to come for me, like the day you told me you loved me. I wanted you to hold onto me. So I waited…and waited…but you left.

We were the moon and stars.

You were my star, my little shining sun keeping me company up in the dark sky.

Looking back…I’m sorry for the times my shadow kept you hidden.

Sorry if I ever made you feel less than what you are.

I’m sorry for not saying “I love you" enough I thought that you would already know how I feel but in the end I realised that you needed to hear that. You **deserved** to know that you are loved. Some part of me was afraid you would never say it back but then again, the few times I said it, you made the ends meet.

Sorry for constantly leaning on you and not asking you about your day. I will forever regret not being able to properly say goodbye.

But Taehyun, thank you.

Thank you for being my other half.

For always being the first person to reach out.

For teaching me how to love.

For teaching me that sometimes things do not work out as we planned. It’s okay.

When the day comes, you will be able to sleep again.

You deserve to be happier.

I hope you meet someone who will love you more than you love yourself. I’m sorry that person is not me.

I have decided to let you go because I know this is what is best for the two of us.

If you ever decide to come back, I will be right here in our broken house. I will always be yours even though you were only once mine.


End file.
